For at least a week or two, I’ve had a song stuck in my head, particularly a few lines of it on repeat.
“Fix your eyes on this one truth, God is madly in love with you.”
A few lines above it is “don’t let your heart be troubled.” It’s not my heart, it’s my head. Anxiety and PTSD do a number on you. And as I e had plenty of time to think lately, it can sometimes be consuming. I can’t help it. I pray all the time. I know Gods got me. I know I’m ok. But that’s not how anxiety works. It can be debilitating and crippling. It is intelligently conniving and surprisingly convincing. But I know when the hurricane comes, Jesus is standing right in front of me, as wide, protecting me from it all. Not that I won’t get wet, not that things won’t happen, but I’m in His arms.
And I go back to the line in the song. What does “madly in love” mean?
Several things I’ve come to realize. I’m not even going to start at the cross. I’m going to start at the very beginning. It’s how I’ve had to think of it recently. Loved us enough to create us, meticulously and mercifully. And with purpose. He loved us so much He left his throne in the most perfect place where He was worshipped to be born among us, in the trash of a manger. To people considered nobodies. He worked. Hard work, too. Carpentry is not an office job for sure. He was hated, despised, and not trusted by many. Though He was most high king, he was traded for a prisoner to be set free. And then the gruesome cross. He knew what was coming. He knew exactly what to expect. And he knew it wouldn’t be anything less than agony. He asked his father to find another way if possible. But even then he said if it’s His will He will do it. And he didn’t fight it as he knew he would be tortured. No begging for mercy or pleading. He suffered agonizing pain willingly and died. He loved us so much He came back. He promised to come again.
All for a bunch of people who tried to destroy him and still do today. They did it on a cross some two thousand years ago, and we do it with words today. Most people won’t even talk to you again over name calling. If that doesn’t prove Jesus is madly in love with us, if that doesn’t define what madly in love means, then I don’t know what can.
Here’s Romans 8:38-39: “For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
For someone who doesn’t have a lot going on right now, I have a lot going on in my head. But that song reminds me to fix my eyes on that one truth, that God is madly in love with me. I literally tear us when it gets to that line in the song. I don’t know what to do about it except cry. It’s so comforting to know that no matter what Jesus loves me. All of us, of course, but each of us especially. Just that truth keeps me going. Love y’all.