Title says it all, doesn’t it. I made it to day two. Started on Sunday the 10th just like everyone at church and around the country, and made it to Monday and dashed that all down. I mean, destroyed it, too. Epic fail!
And it’s ok. I’m just starting again today.
It wasn’t the prayer part that got me. I pray a lot. It was the fasting. Of course it was the fasting. And the way I failed disappointed me even more.
So this 21 Days reminds me of Lent in a way that participants give up something for the 21 days. I chose sweets and sodas. Many reasons for it. But it’s two things I have almost constantly. Well the sodas are, but I do get a sweet tooth pretty often. And I prayed about it and joined my friends Kevin and Holly who had already decided similarly to give it up. Good plan.
So day one, got up, went to church, recorded what I think was a great podcast with Kevin, went home, prayed and took a nap before grabbing a kid and heading to Kevin and Holly’s to hang. We prayed. I was very tired, but had a great time. Headed home. Not tempted in the least, prayed lots. No sweets and sodas. Easy peazy.
Monday, I got up and went about business as usual. Nothing was unusual about it at all. Wasn’t working, but got stuff done around the house, hung out with the kids and Michelle, prayed prayed prayed, even got in some Pokémon. Satisfied it was a good day as I joined Michelle that night for Dr. Pol on Disney+. That man is a very entertaining vet and has a great show. That’s about the time I realize I’m holding a bottle of Diet Coke. (I like the flavor mostly) I initially started to reason it wasn’t sugar, but I said no sodas. Of course a few pieces of chocolate before that came to mind (I’m a sucker for Reece’s cups). Then I realized I’d broken the fast little by little all day. Very eye opening.
What I worried about initially is that temptation would be this face to face challenge where I would be directly tempted to eat and drink these things head on. But instead, my challenge was habit and complacency. I wasn’t jonesing for these things, it was just habit I had them. I didn’t notice I was doing it.
And that’s the thing I learned last night. Sometimes our battles aren’t head on, they’re when I don’t pay attention. I was ready for the face to face battle, but I didn’t prepare for my daily habits that snuck up on me before I knew it.
I wanted this 21 day project to be purposeful and meaningful. And yes, I broke the fast on day 2. That’s fine, I bet I won’t anymore! Why, because now my eyes are paying attention to what I’m doing more purposefully. What a lesson God teaches on day two!